My eharmony review

So this Sunday I'll be coming to the end of my 6 month subscription and I'd like to break down how my whole venture into online dating has been. I'd like to mention that I did put plenty of effort and thought into my profile. No blank qestions and I tried to be open and honest in all of my answers. Also included several clear photos of myself and even took down one picture of me and one of my good friends who happend to be a girl since there were some post were other females sort of frowned down on that.

So here we go.

Total matches 118. Out of those matches, i closed 95 of them. I would say approx. 80% of those that i closed was due to them never replying. I'd give em about three weeks to a month before closing them away. The other 20% I closed either because of distance or I found there pictures or somthing in there profile unattractive.

I got to open communication with 3 matches. One was really nice but after a few messages she said she wasn't interested. Another one had a lot of potential but she just put me on hold out of the blue, then closed me out a couple of months later. And one just dissapeard of the face of the earth.

So that leaves 23 matches that closed me out.

I could deduce then that I was matched with about 26 actual members, the rest were just non-members who couldn't even reply.

A lot of numbers but the only one that really matters is zero. That's the number of dates i got.

I live in orange county, and i set my distance to 100 miles so that would encompass LA and san diego, pretty dense population but I guess not enough.

Will i be renewing my subscription? That's a resounding NO!

Hope this is helpful to any potential new members.

I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience. Did you try expanding your match criteria? I have received hundreds and hundreds of matches and gone on quite a few dates. I haven't met Mr. Right (for me) yet, but I've met some really great guys.

I'm sorry you've had such a bad experience. Did you try expanding your match criteria? I have received hundreds and hundreds of matches and gone on quite a few dates. I haven't met Mr. Right (for me) yet, but I've met some really great guys.

I appreciate the concern lookin, but no need to be sorry. I'm just a upset about the money that I'm out. I'm very open minded and i think my match criteria reflects that. My only major stipulation in regards to that was distance and height, didn't want to be matched with anyone taller then myself, I think it looks funny dancing with a taller girl!

I imagine that my age had a lot to do with my lack of sucess. I'm 25 and i figure most girls around that age aren't quite looking for a long term relationship just yet.

Did you have your Photo shown or hidden?

If you had it hidden, thats probably the reason for your dismal results...

If you did show it, then perhaps your age does have something to do with it, however, if you are in Orange County, there really SHOULD be a lot of people on EH, even in your age bracket.

If she is a lot taller than you slow dancing with her can be quite stimulating

I got wished into the cornfield a lot. He has no power outside of Peaksville, Ohio. I'm still waiting for his call. Seriously, I think you WERE matched with a lot of unpaid women, what they call registered users. Surprising, as Los Angeles and the OC is a densely populated area and your matching criteria was liberal, not too restrictive. Guess you'll just need to explore offline options, classes, hobbies, the park, coffeehouses. Sounds like a broken record, but I have heard people meet SOs at places like that. Your youth if anything will work in your favor...

You live in the LA area and in 6 months only got 118 matches??!! People in North Dakota got more than that.

I was rather dissapointed by just the lack of matches. Not sure how many matches the avg user receives but I defintily felt like i wasn't gettting my money's worth. My pictures were availiable to anyone who'd want to take a peek. I've never had a problem meeting girls. I'm no Don Juan but i'm certainly not shy around the opposite sex. The whole 29 dimensions matching system just really appealed to my inner scieince geek!

I got more than that in 3 DAYS so something in his requirements is too restrictive! But hey, hold out for what you want/need.

Ok, I'm going to pick apart your post a little, hope you don't mind! It may help you.

1. When you "tried to be open and honest in all" your answers, did you share any habits/hobbies that only someone has grown to love you could tolerate? Seriously, there are things a woman will tolerate in a relationship that may be a deal breaker if just starting out.
2. How many of the ladies closed before you wised up to the 'girl with me in photo' mistake?
3a. You closed 95 of 118, that leaves 23 who had a chance (not 26, your math needs some fine-tuning LOL). Think about that. you reduced your own matches by 80%.
3b. Look at the reasons you closed them: distance? Weren't you the one who chose the distance and the importance of it?? And they were 'unattractive', yet you didn't get a chance to know anything about any of them other than their intro and picture.
(just a rationalization but perhaps the one who put you on hold, then closed you, found someone and didn't want to lead you on.)

I just wanted you to see what it looks like from a third party. To me it looks like EH didn't fail you, you failed you. Be honest with yourself: are you truly looking for a life partner or are you looking for a 'doll' (i.e. an empty-headed plaything to display)? Decide that then you can figure out how to go about getting it.

You know, it is okay to be dissappointed in a match making site, if you say, don't get a match? We have all had some dissappointments along the way or the majority of the posts here wouldn't be about negative topics. I think you're picking apart his dissappointment is pretty insensitive.

Whether EH worked for him or not, he has the experience he had to base his opinion on, and you yours. Not everyone is going to succeed every time. Statistically it just doesn't happen.

I didn't mean to be insensitive. If I hurt the OP's feelings I'm sorry!

His actions didn't fit with what he said he wanted, perhaps because he's young and may not know exactly what he wants. He posted and I gave my perspective. I thought we were here to help each other.

My feelings are 100 percent intact and I am in no way offended. I acutally appreciate the critique of my post.

1. All my hobbies were typical stuff, like going out, comedy club, lounges. I also enjoy camping, playing guitar working on cars. I don't think any of these things would offend the typical woman. The only exception would be that i mentioned that i do like going down to the range to practice shooting. I didnt say anything about hunting, and since i'm buddhist i don't even kill flies that get in the house. But i could see how someone might just go and assume that i'm some avid killer of bambi's and other defenselss animals.

2 I had the picture of me and the girl up for about a month before taking it down. I thought it was a very innocent picture since it was just me and her sitting on a ski lift together going up the moutiain. We werent even touching each other. I took it down just cuz of the things i starting reading on this forum. And at that point, i hadn't been closed out by anyone yet. Actually, my first reply i had from anyone was like two months into my membership when a match put me on hold. I was actually excited about being put on hold, atleast i knew there was somone alive out there.

3 The number 26 was my guess for the amount of registerd members i was matched with. The 23 that closed me out i figures were really members since I'm guessing most non members wouldn't even have botherd. And then add 3 to that who i acutally communicated with maks 26.

I did indeed chose the acceptable distance, but that didn't keep eharmony from matchnig me with ladies from other states taht were over my max distnace. I think this was that flex matching in action. And finally, If i wasn't physically attracted to them. then ofcourse i closed. An unattractive proflie to me was actually if it didn't look like they put much effort into it. It indicated to me that they weren't taking it seriously, and were likely not taking it seriosly because they were'nt paying. That's just the way i felt about that.

Quan L

Thanks Kate. It was incredibly nice of you to stick up for me!

I hope I don't sound ridiculous with this comment...but what were your religious settings? Were you willing only to be matched with other buddhist? Not sure of the population of them in the US but I know in the Northeast...there doesn't seem to be alot of buddhist in the area..Just a thought.

I cannot wait for my membership to expire. 9 months in and not even one date with next to no settings restricting my match settings.