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solarpoolwoman's Avatar

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Well, you gotta be sure of your feelings to avoid getting hurt and hurting somebody else's feelings.

- October 3rd, 2009, 05:45 am
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If you have to wonder if what you're doing is cheating, you probably shouldn't be doing it.

- October 3rd, 2009, 05:41 pm
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olneyjeeps Like a match made in heaven, but it was made on EH.

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What's that golden rule "treat others as you would have them treat you"?


It's funny, in another thread, someone commented "it's not like you are married"  I see relationships as a "test run" for marriage... nothing should be different and no rules should change.

- October 6th, 2009, 01:28 am
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Mugsy Pondering, pondering....

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I like to think of it simply:  If what you're doing would hurt the person you care about, then you shouldn't be doing it.  

- October 8th, 2009, 06:23 pm
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This is real life if you what to play the field then make that clear from the being don't drag the other person just to hurt them. YOU KNOW WHAT CHEATING IS. Don't do it!

- October 9th, 2009, 08:31 pm
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roguewolf1 Zack found his calling as tailgate party chef

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If you have to read this article to understand what cheating is than your iq is less than 100.
- October 10th, 2009, 02:40 am
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agoodplace found bliss....

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It says a lot about someone who will do to others what he/she would not want done to them.  It is probably the most selfish thing a person can do - toy with a heart.

- October 14th, 2009, 07:30 pm
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Wow, there are a lot of strong opinions about cheating. It sounds like they're guilty before getting a fair trial.

Well, I see it much differently. First, you have to have an understanding in place. If you are dating someone, you need to understand your commitment to each other, if any. If there is no agreement on this, you could be in for a surprise. One might think that it's perfectly alright to see others and the other one might be struggling to create something that really isn't there.

Here's how I would do it...

If I find myself becoming romantically involved, I would simple ask my new partner what she wants to do. Does she want to date around and if so, is she is ok with me doing the same. Or does she want to just date me and see how it goes. Then, going forward, you know what is expected of each other.

Then I wouldn't worry about what the other one does and it should be the same for me. Each of us can be "friendly" with others of the opposite sex without the threat of ruining the relationship. It all about intention. You either intend on being committed to a person or not. Just because you enjoy someone elses company, it does not mean that you want to go to bed with them. But, if you say one thing and then do the other, well I guess the handwriting is on the wall. I suggest you read it and act accordingly.
- October 23rd, 2009, 02:57 pm
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I was married for 33 years, but he passed way. I've met someone, but he comes over after he gets off at 1:30 in the morning. That is about the only time we see each other, except on his day off.I work during the day,when I get off he is going to work. He is so far in debt and don't have any money to take me anywhere. We haven't talked about it just being me and him. And, I like being able to go out to dinner,or a movie. He has told me that he loves me, but we haven't did you know what. I do really like him, but just want to go out and meet different guys, before I get tied down to one. I don't know if it is wrong and he might be doing the same thing to me

- October 23rd, 2009, 03:10 pm
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@roguewolf1: If you have to insult people's IQ in an advice forum, then clearly your own IQ is the one suffering.

There's a lot of people out there who aren't sure about cheating and IQ has nothing to do with it... there's a ton of people who'll get caught in a cheating situation and not feel like they've been cheating on anyone, for instance, getting friendly with someone at work.  Your partner may feel like it's something too close to a relationship, but you don't... Thanks for the article, EH!

I guess the main idea here; communication! As always, it's key to a relationship. Communicate what cheating is to you. If you don't like your partner hugging someone you feel is a threat, say so, and let him/her know why!

- October 23rd, 2009, 11:43 pm
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