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Homer231's Avatar

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Well, this is my first time asking for advice from an expert, but here it goes...

I met someone off of EH about two weeks ago, and we have seen each other about 4 times..Two dates out and two casual "brief" meet for coffee meetings. She lives REALLY close by, and the coffee was in her driveway before she left for work.

My biggest problem was I liked her way too much in the beginning, and sort of let my jealousy side show, when she had "other plans" and would go out. Basically, the immature side of me believed it was other men(whether true or not); and I sorta let that be known via texts. After having a phone call conversation and the air being cleared..it got back on track(briefly)...but then again my immaturity got the best of me and sent some sarcastic text messages. Personally, I know I blew this one.

My question is essentially this...I think she has decided to say good-bye, but I texted her a "Hope you have a great day" and she replied with the same thing. Then a follow-up text about going out again...and nothing(no reply). Why acknowledge any text if shes trying to fade away???

Just some additional notes so you don't think I'm a stalker LOL...I have never gone to her home unless invited, and I have never texted her multiple times, twice a day at max..and before this, it was always a send and reply mode on both sides...

Normally, I have had your regular modes of dating, but for some reason I went head over heels for this one and it showed...oh well
- November 2nd, 2009, 07:44 am
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You might as well face the facts, ya over did it, just like ya said. You really need to get a grip on jealousy's ugly head. I have found that most woman are turned off by over jealous men. You might have been OK showing a tad of jealousy once, but no way twice. She now knows you simply put, are the jealous type, n you really need to take a good look at why so you can fix it. I'm no shrink, but I at one time was a jealous person. I found out that it usually stems from abandonment issues from our pasts. I worked on it, and am no longer the jealous type. I can tell you when I was in my late teens and early 20's, my jealousy ruined at least 2 nice relationships, so get a handle on it soon my friend, u will be glad u did..
- November 2nd, 2009, 08:23 am
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scarlet13 whateva wit your howeva!

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wrote :
...I think she has decided to say good-bye, but I texted her a "Hope you have a great day" and she replied with the same thing. Then a follow-up text about going out again...and nothing(no reply). Why acknowledge any text if shes trying to fade away???
She's trying to be polite.

live and learn.
- November 2nd, 2009, 08:37 am
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Bearwolf102 Loveing life

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Bro I think you need to look to your house first before you reach out to anouther girl. You can't expect to find someone who is going to make you happy if you are not already happy. Nothing snuffs out feelings of careing faster than jealousy and smothering behavior. She was trying to be friendly. She was very kind to give you as much slack as she did.

Before you date again find some activities, a church group, or something that makes you happy first. This has a side benifit of putting you in contact with girls who also enjoy something that you enjoy. A great common ground point.

Good luck bro,
Bearwolf102
- November 2nd, 2009, 08:48 am
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scarlet13 wrote :
She's trying to be polite.

live and learn.
well said
- November 2nd, 2009, 09:42 am
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Homer231's Avatar

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Thanks everybody...I figured as much..I guess I was under the assumption usually when you want to sever ties..you pretty much just let it go completely and don't reply back...but like 2 of you said.."Live and Learn"

By the way were also Facebook friends..leave it as is..or just delete it all together and move on?
- November 2nd, 2009, 10:17 am
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Bearwolf102 Loveing life

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Ask yourself this question. Can you just be friends? If the answer is yes than yes if the answer is no than no. This means never asking her out again. Listening to her talk to you about her new guy. How he makes her feel good or bad. That is a hard thing for most men. I know it always was for me.

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- November 2nd, 2009, 10:41 am
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Leave it for two weeks. Let her decide what she wants to do.

If you still feel really strongly about deleting her after that, go ahead.

eta: This is only if you intend to just let her sit on your list and not talk to her. Take Bearwolf's advice if there's going to be correspondence.
- November 2nd, 2009, 10:44 am
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Yes..Bearwolf is correct...and so are you Faira..I guess I'll leave it for 2 weeks...but I wouldn't want to be friends and hear about the new guys, since I tried to be one of them. Call it ego...but I guess I would just move on..
- November 2nd, 2009, 11:39 am
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***UPDATE*** I just, after several hours, got a text reply, saying yes...that would be nice going out to dinner. I'm more confused now then ever...maybe I just misinterpreted this whole thing, but it was like I described in my original post.
- November 2nd, 2009, 11:49 am
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