Inside the Mind of the Single Guy

Ladies, listen up. If you're having trouble in the dating trenches -- whether it's meeting a guy, attracting the right kind of guy, or maintaining a guy's interest -- this may just be the article for you

Inside the Mind of the Single Guy
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Ladies, listen up. If you’re having trouble in the dating trenches -- whether it’s meeting a guy, attracting the right kind of guy, or maintaining a guy’s interest -- this may just be the article for you. We’re going inside the mind of the single guy to find out what makes him tick. From his dating dos and don’ts to how he feels about monogamy and marriage, you’ll learn all you need to know to successfully snag the attention -- and, possibly, affections -- of the single guy.

Real guys like real girls (so just be yourself)
If you’re looking to meet a genuinely good guy, the first thing you need to know is that real guys like real girls. You don’t have to have 36-24-36 measurements or play fickle relationship games, and you definitely shouldn’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Guys consider phoniness a huge turnoff, so the next time you meet a single guy, do yourself a favor and just be your fabulous self. Maybe you won’t attract every guy in the room, but the right guy will be intrigued. The rest is up to you!

Independent women rule
For the single guy, the beauty of being single lies in his ability to have a full and rewarding life independent of a relationship. This allows him to nurture his career ambitions, enjoy time with friends, date interesting women, and live life to the fullest. That’s why it’s important for you to do the same. By being strong, independent, and fully in love with your own fabulous single gal life, you’re that much more likely to attract the single guy who just might be right for you.

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It's okay for you to make the first move
By now we’ve all heard about those notorious pickup artists who employ various tactics to meet, woo, and ultimately bed their conquests. Aside from these players and their questionable motives, there are single guys out there who might prefer that you make the first move. In fact, a lot of guys report that they like it when a girl makes the first move. It lets them know she’s interested (and it’s a real confidence boost!). But a word of caution -- if you make the first move, don’t make the second, third, and fourth. Guys want and need to be part of the delicate dating chase. If you do all the work, they’ll just stop chasing.

 

Physical intimacy means different things to different people
One very crucial thing to know about some single guys is that sex and intimacy can be two different things. And here’s where dating can get tricky. Typically, women equate sex with intimacy. It’s hormonal, even biological. If we’re getting physical with someone, we’re at least thinking about having a relationship with him. Like it or not, it’s often different for men. Sex can be perceived as more recreational. Sleeping with someone does not necessarily mean they’re looking to get serious with her. This information isn’t meant to change what you believe. It’s meant to give you some perspective. If you’re taking your physical relationship to the next level, you might want to have a conversation first to make sure your intentions and his are clearly stated. Then you can decide for yourself if you’re ready.

Most single guys are not marriage-minded
This isn’t bad news. In fact, it’s valuable information you can put to good use. The sooner you understand that most single men are not on the prowl for a wife, the easier it will be for you to relate to your date. As fabulous females, we sometimes have marriage on the brain and often spend much of the first date evaluating whether or not the guy seated across from us could be The One. Men, on the other hand, go on a first date to have a good time and ultimately decide if they want a second date with you. It’s as simple as that.

Maybe the guys are on to something, ladies. By approaching dating with the attitude that they just want to have fun and meet a variety of interesting people until they meet someone worth committing to, men are playing the field with a healthy dating attitude. Instead of spending all your single gal time wondering and worrying if and when you’ll meet your husband, you too could become a successful single by taking the focus off of when and start enjoying right now.

Commitment is not a bad word
Just because he hasn’t been planning his wedding since he was 8 doesn’t mean the single guy won’t eventually commit to you. The truth is, when the right girl does come along, most single men are comfortable committing. By taking their time and really getting to know the women they date, guys again have the right idea. Take a page from their dating playbook and just have fun dating and relating! That way, when you do meet someone truly special, you’ll not only know he’s The One, but you'll be ready, willing, and able to commit because you’ve successfully played the field.

So there you have it, ladies. Insight straight from the source -- the mind of the single guy. By applying some of his dating success strategies to your own single gal life, you may just discover a happier and healthier relationship future.

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241 comments on “Inside the Mind of the Single Guy


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After reading this article, it just solidified what I've already known. Men expect women 2 act like men. Be detatched emotionally, view sex as a mandatory, recreational way 2 pass time w/o repercussions, kinda like watching football, or fishing or whatever. Women ain't wired like that guys...I love sex, but it means more 2 me than just something 2 do. I ain't gonna give up the goodies in the name of gaining relationship. It's not worth it. Not in a dating relationship. It would have 2 be a very committed dating relationship. Especially since all it does is create a relationship based on his needs only. Sure, I have a life. I'm independent. I've had 2 be. And I'll shower u w/all kinds of attention IF, and the article even says this, IF u take the initiative and persue me 1st. U know I'm interested. I've given u "the look." Probably more than once. Now it's your turn. If u don't try and talk 2 me, ur not interested. That's just a fact. Cuz trust me, if I try 2 talk 2 u 1st, and jump thru all ur hoops trying 2 get ur attention, what does the article say? U lose interest. So I ain't goin' there. It does help 2 know, and I'm hopin' the article is right, that men are not afraid of making a commitment. They go on a 1st date 2 c if they want a 2nd date? Really? That thought takes some pressure off...What continues 2 concern me is the apathetic attitude toward emotional intimacy. How many of us women have experienced a man sharing deep, emotionally intimate details about his life, not understanding that 2 a woman, this is almost the equivalent 2 emotional love making. It opens up a woman's soul 2 start breathing this man into their life, 2 fill in the empty spaces that long 2 b filled with, do I dare say it, love? I feel loved when a man opens up 2 me. I feel like he trusts me. U just know when a man is sharing something w/u that is more intimate than "just friends". It can feel inappropriate if that man is married. U put space between u and them cuz u know it just ain't right 2 talk about certain things with married men. But if the guy is single and persuing u, and I find out he's sharing the same intimate details w/another woman, checkin' her out at the same time 4 the same reasons, I feel violated. Exposed. Emotionally raped. Like he took something of mine that didn't belong 2 him. A piece of my heart. That's y I don't have sex casually. Intimacy has levels. And w/women, it starts w/the verbal. So, what I hear this article saying is, I, as a woman, am supposed 2 b more like a man. Unemotional, detatched, unavailable, free of responsibility, so he can feel like a man? No wonder I can't find a man. I'm not a man. I'm a woman. And I unbelievably act like one. Go figure.
Ican say this about it if woman was to act like a man they could not handle it !an there are some woman that do just that act just like a man they [players]
- February 07, 2010 07:48 PM

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I think that some of us women just get tired of all the dates that lead to nothing more than a bunch of dates. I like getting ready for what I hope is at least an enjoyable date. Look forward to hopefully a nice second date and more if it makes it to that point. What happens when you want to find someone meaningful and so many men aren't? What happens when you meet someone who then becames jealous and such after only a few dates..now that is a turn-off. I think the upfront expectation is valid with telling the other in what you are looking for. It doesn't at all mean that you both will even click on the first or second- or ever date, but it sure saves a lot of frustration in knowing. If you want to go out for a fun date or more than make sure both sides are in for it. I have fun dates with non sexual men. Sex does change things for me as I am the typical female. Upfront talk is valid.

- September 26, 2009 03:32 PM

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I am single and one of the most troubling aspects of the article is dealing with the womens read about me bio. What I have found out while they are talking to you they are looking at somebody else. Answers range from none at all in guided communication to decline fasttrack. Other tricks is ignore all communications.However, give the guy the wrong phone number and when he ask for correct number close him out. Other tricks lie about your background, Agree to secure call and block the call. Ask for a guys number and close him out. My point is find other activities that keep you busy and just move a long with your own individual life as your single and you are your own best friend.Work at dating but remember there are limitations it is a buyers market with an instant click. PWR

- September 24, 2009 04:51 PM

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