Inside the Mind of a Single Guy

From his dating dos and don'ts to how he feels about monogamy and marriage -- we're taking you inside the mind of the mysterious single guy!

Inside the Mind of a Single Guy
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Ladies, listen up. If you’re having trouble in the dating trenches -- whether it’s meeting a guy, attracting the right kind of guy, or maintaining a guy’s interest -- this may just be the article for you. We’re going inside the mind of the single guy to find out what makes him tick. From his dating dos and don’ts to how he feels about monogamy and marriage, you’ll learn all you need to know to successfully snag the attention -- and, possibly, affections -- of the single guy.

Real guys like real girls (so just be yourself)

If you’re looking to meet a genuinely good guy, the first thing you need to know is that real guys like real girls. You don’t have to have 36-24-36 measurements or play fickle relationship games, and you definitely shouldn’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Guys consider phoniness a huge turnoff, so the next time you meet a single guy, do yourself a favor and just be your fabulous self. Maybe you won’t attract every guy in the room, but the right guy will be intrigued. The rest is up to you!

Independent women rule

For the single guy, the beauty of being single lies in his ability to have a full and rewarding life independent of a relationship. This allows him to nurture his career ambitions, enjoy time with friends, date interesting women, and live life to the fullest. That’s why it’s important for you to do the same. By being strong, independent, and fully in love with your own fabulous single gal life, you’re that much more likely to attract the single guy who just might be right for you.

It's okay for you to make the first move

By now we’ve all heard about those notorious pickup artists who employ various tactics to meet, woo, and ultimately bed their conquests. Aside from these players and their questionable motives, there are single guys out there who might prefer that you make the first move. In fact, a lot of guys report that they like it when a girl makes the first move. It lets them know she’s interested (and it’s a real confidence boost!). But a word of caution -- if you make the first move, don’t make the second, third, and fourth. Guys want and need to be part of the delicate dating chase. If you do all the work, they’ll just stop chasing.

Physical intimacy means different things to different people

One very crucial thing to know about some single guys is that sex and intimacy can be two different things. And here’s where dating can get tricky. Typically, women equate sex with intimacy and relationships. It’s hormonal, even biological. Like it or not, it’s often different for men. For some men, sex can be perceived as more recreational. Sleeping with someone does not necessarily mean they’re looking to get serious with her. This information isn’t meant to change what you believe. It’s meant to give you some perspective. If you’re taking your physical relationship to the next level, you might want to have a conversation first to make sure your intentions and his are clearly stated. Then you can decide for yourself if you’re ready.

Most single guys are not marriage-minded

This isn’t bad news. In fact, it’s valuable information you can put to good use. The sooner you understand that most single men are not on the prowl for a wife, the easier it will be for you to relate to your date. As fabulous females, we sometimes have marriage on the brain and often spend much of the first date evaluating whether or not the guy seated across from us could be The One. Men, on the other hand, go on a first date to have a good time and ultimately decide if they want a second date with you. It’s as simple as that.

Maybe the guys are on to something, ladies. By approaching dating with the attitude that they just want to have fun and meet a variety of interesting people until they meet someone worth committing to, men are playing the field with a healthy dating attitude. Instead of spending all your single gal time wondering and worrying if and when you’ll meet your husband, you too could become a successful single by taking the focus off of when and start enjoying right now.

Commitment is not a bad word

Just because he hasn’t been planning his wedding since he was 8 doesn’t mean the single guy won’t eventually commit to you. The truth is, when the right girl does come along, most single men are comfortable committing. By taking their time and really getting to know the women they date, guys again have the right idea. Take a page from their dating playbook and just have fun dating and relating! That way, when you do meet someone truly special, you’ll not only know he’s The One, but you'll be ready, willing, and able to commit because you’ve successfully played the field.

So there you have it, ladies. Insight straight from the source -- the mind of the single guy. By applying some of his dating success strategies to your own single gal life, you may just discover a happier and healthier relationship future.

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41 comments on “Inside the Mind of a Single Guy


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One guy referred to us as cars, good luck to him in finding anyone else after that comment. Women are not test-drivable cars, and neither should men view themselves like that. I wouldn't want anyone playing with my "gadgets" just to see if they like what's underneath the hood.

LOL... love the way you put it, mate. Made my day. ; )

- November 22, 2008 08:18 AM

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Can we get more information about this "Independent Woman" turn off concept?

I've been on my own a long time now, so I don't know if being able to jump start my own vehicle is too independent or if being able to support myself financially is independent enough? (Sorry, context: in Tahoe the guys are pretty much looking for a Sugar Momma, so not being able to support them too has been a tough one to overcome).

- November 21, 2008 09:45 PM

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datingin2008 wrote:

It's exhausting trying to mind read! I am often left to wonder if a guy just isn't into me, or if he is intimidated by me, or something else. I gotta say, I'd hope for a specific list here :)

Ditto ... Its a little scary (based on feedback here) that we actually don't have to mind read (LMAO) and that it really does in fact boil down to food, sex, and remote control domination.

Come on ... give us a little SOMETHING to work with here! LMAO

- November 21, 2008 09:42 PM

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