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To date is to have standards. But expectations for your future flame must have compromising perimeters to allow for the unpredicted. Impractical expectations can cause dissention and resentment in existing relationships and ultimately curb your opportunities for new ones. With expectations set so high, are you just setting yourself up for inevitable disappointment?
Finding Fault
It seems the older you get, the more critical you become. You couldn’t date a woman who has children or you wouldn’t consider a divorced man. Through the greener-grass mentality, you believe that there is a better match to be found, a combination of all your persnickety prerequisites and then some. The challenge is to examine why you feel entitled to a perfect 10 when everyone – including you – is blessed with imperfections. To have a discerning eye is logical, but don’t get wrapped up in the concept of impossible bedtime stories. Is it really such a bad thing to concede that love and relationships really aren’t flawless and simple?
Far-Fetched Fantasy
When seeking out Mr. or Ms. Right, everyone has a fantasized ideal in mind. Visualizing the utopian mate may actually help you discover what you are looking for in a relationship. On the other hand, it’s important to recognize that perfection doesn’t exist outside of your psyche. Some people may come close, but the image of the ideal mate creeps its way back in with its lofty conditions.
Limit Less
When you set rigid guidelines and specific characteristics that your ladylove or main man must epitomize, you effectively limit your options. Vain requirements such as hair color, body type and size of bank account only place the focus on superficial criteria rather than the gooey insides. Okay, so perhaps removing your limits altogether would put you on the fast track to Loserville, but relaxing your restrictions might just expand your pool of potential suitors.
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